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I gave Facebook the flick!
- June
- 25
10:36 pm Christian living, Marriage, Social Media, Writing
See ya later, Facebook!
And it seems I’m not alone … just read this from the Herald Sun today!
In my case, the Lord planted the seed in my heart about a month ago when I first heard of Footprints reader Jo’s love/hate relationship with Facebook. You can read what she has to say about it by clicking here and here.
I began to realise that Facebook was controlling me. There had to be life beyond the computer screen! As if I don’t spend enough of my time tapping away at the keyboard – at work, running Footprints, at home …
At first I didn’t want to know about it. Facebook and I were quite comfortable with each other’s company, thanks very much. But then I began to wonder … what if ???...
It took a few weeks but it began to make sense. So I de-activated my personal Facebook account.
(Don’t worry, I haven’t gone completely cold turkey. I still have the Footprints Facebook page to look after! But that’s much easier for me to keep in perspective.)
It was worth it just for the big smile and hug I got from my hubby when I announced my decision to him! He was totally thrilled.
Facebook has been the major cause of our relatively few disagreements over recent years. First of all, he wasn’t comfortable with the thought of me connecting with guys I knew before I met him. At first I thought he was being paranoid, but the Lord softened my heart so I agreed that I would not ”friend” or accept friend requests from any male that he did not know.
Many times hubby mentioned that he felt a bit neglected especially once teenage son and daughter also began Facebooking.
My husband is a more private person than I am, and was not sure why I would want to post photos on Facebook for all the world to see. I changed my privacy settings so that only my “friends” could see them – all nearly 500 of them.
What nudged me to take the final step? I realised I was spending more time with my “friends” online – and I use the term loosely – than with my loved ones and my REAL friends. Why was I spending so much time chatting to people that hadn’t had the time of day for me back in high school? Or people that are really only acquaintances?
If they were REAL friends, I shouldn’t need Facebook to stay connected with them!
It’s been an interesting journey. The first few days I did suffer from withdrawal symptoms. I was cranky. I felt at a bit lost after work in the evenings (when I used to log on), and on the weekend, so I had more nanna naps and went to bed earlier!
One evening, my daughter and I baked up a storm. I planted some more vegies in my garden. I watched some DVDs with the family. I even caught myself vaccuming the house on my day off instead of Facebooking!
I’ve done more writing than I’ve done in ages. Just look at how many times I’ve blogged this month, compared to previous months! Consider my last post, on Christians and swearing. Facebook so filled my life that I would never have even stopped to PONDER the issue, let alone taken the time to WRITE about it.
I’ve spent more quality time with my husband, and I don’t think it’s any coincidence that I feel more relaxed in general. Hubby is not just enjoying my physical presence (now that I’m not ducking away to check Facebook all the time), but I’m emotionally present as well.
So yes, there is life after Facebook.
A handful of friends and relatives know of my decision to give Facebook the flick. Only one of my Facebook “friends” has contacted me, worried by my sudden disappearance, which was sweet, but one out of nearly 500? It seems Facebook is coping quite well without me!
One thing I know for sure. When I get to the end of this life, I won’t be wishing that I’d spent more time on Facebook!
7 comments
Rebecca, not long before I “deactivated” I posted a quote from my pastor, about how important it is to attend church. One of my FB friends (but someone I haven’t seen IRL for at least 10 years) took exception to it and posted a negative comment. I think this was a big catalyst for me … what we put on FB can be so easily misunderstood … who needs more crap (sorry but I can’t think of a better word) in their life?!!! Not me!
Posted by Webmaster, on June 26th, 2011, at 11:33 am. #.
Girls something good on Facebook and there are many, many like this out there. Facebook is great if it used right.
Above and below is link to Christian group. Australian Christian Women in Business.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=group_131161736958559&ap=1
Description
A place to inspire and encourage each other in our own individual christian walk. A place to network and discuss how as Christian women we are coping in our business lives.
And He has on His robe and on His thigh a name written: KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS. (Revelation 19:16)
I keep the Lord in mind always. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Psalm 16:8
Hope to see you there,
Blessings, Noela Ollenburg
Posted by Noela Ollenburg, on June 26th, 2011, at 12:52 pm. #.
Since we moved to the city from the country, and we don’t have many face to face friends there yet, FB has meant I can keep in touch with those we left behind, and break the ice with those folks who we do know in our new location and renew aquaintances, which has been a big help.
I also use FB to promote my blog and keep in touch with my readers. Without it, my blog would probably not be as successful as it is.
I have had some heated discussions with folks on FB, its true, but it has become a wonderful source of commentary and material for my writing.
The one thing I don’t appreciate about FB is how people have come to think reposting a status update equates to social action. This is a real beef of mine. Things like “if we all change our profile pics to cartoons it will raise awareness of child abuse.” I find this silly, and downright offensive. I wrote an article about it here – The Porn of Social Networking Conscience – How We Get Off On Raising Awareness http://www.johilder.com/?p=538
I do get friend requests from time to time from old school friends, but I rarely accept them. If we haven’t spoken in the last 25 or so years, I’m not sure there is much to talk about. I’m not known for my sentimentality!
Facebook has become a part of my life, although I know I could give it up if it was adversely affecting my family or my life, there is no reason for me to do so. I have often compared it in my mind with drinking alcohol – perhaps in moderation, but for some, even a little is too much.
Thanks for bringing up the topic Janet!
JO 
Jo Hilder recently posted..Sunday Music – The Best Song About God, In The World
It’s the same as anything Janet. Switching off the tv can do amazing things for family life. Limiting time on Playstation or Xbox is great for kids. I have stayed off Facebook games and refuse to buy into a lot of the garbage that comes through, the same as I don’t pass on stupid emails that must go to 10 friends OR ELSE! All things in moderation… Friends posts can be hidden. People can be blocked. Facebook is great for keeping up with our Canadian family members, and I have friends who have so time stretched through work, if we didn’t Facebook post I’d never know how they were, if they were having a hard time… and if they need prayer. So look at both sides. Too much choccy is a blessing and a curse (so the rumour goes anyway!) All things in moderation and yes, beware who you friend! Boy, I think we all have regrets in that department! Keep up the great work.
Posted by Cate Russell-Cole, on June 26th, 2011, at 5:06 pm. #.
Hip hip hooray! So happy you did this. Go against the flow.
Facebook is not evil….it is just a tool afterall. But if it is costing you in other areas, it’s a good idea to give it up.
The withdrawals will fade. I do from time to time, have thoughts that I am missing out since I deleted my FB account, but they are fleeting and I think about all that I have gained back by deleting FB and the time I wasted on it.
Jo Princess Warrior recently posted..Five Books that changed who I am …
Posted by Jo Princess Warrior, on June 26th, 2011, at 5:47 pm. #.
It just keeps getting better and better – I have now learn to crochet granny squares, which might seem simple, but has been a lifelong dream of mine!
I don’t think I’ll be re-activating FB anytime soon …
Posted by Webmaster, on July 6th, 2011, at 2:05 pm. #.
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It’s a tricky one! I have a FB account, and I use it fairly regularly. But I’ve been offended there too – interestingly enough I had a similar experience to the journalist you linked to – seeing wedding and party photos when you haven’t been invited… it can hurt.
And there’s a ‘friend’ of mine who I really like – love – in real life, but her FB persona rubs me the wrong way… I’ve had to hide her posts to avoid the feelings they bring up in me. Perhaps I’m the problem and I need to quit FB too!
Posted by Rebecca, on June 25th, 2011, at 10:59 pm. #.